Holy fuck. I can't believe I'm writing this. This is an update to my previous post of the same title.
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The Tl;dr of my last post:
Recently I can't get/stay hard, my gf and I decided to spice things up by watching porn together. She puts on a BlackedRaw cuckolding video and I got super hard (I've never seen cuckold porn). She noticed and said “yeah that makes sense” and jacked me off, but now she looks at me differently.
Update:
So that night (Two days ago) she went out for her regular weekly girls night with some friends from work, which isn't new, she's been doing it since before we started dating last year. I didn't think much about it until someone suggested in chat that she might be flirting with other guys. I felt like I was holding my breath until she got home (late, by the way) and she definitely looked at me differently, like not as soft as normally. I asked her how it was and she said it was fine as usual, and updated me on some friend drama before abruptly saying she needed to go to bed and not talking about it any more.
I barely slept, and yesterday morning before we both went to work I asked her directly: "Did you flirt with other guys when you were out?" and she rolled her eyes and laughed about it, and she said "Why, are you worried?" and walked out the door. Last night she said she was just joking and played it off, but I swear something was off, like her energy was different, and then this morning she left for work before I did.
The second I got off work today she texted me: "We need to talk." and my head almost exploded. I was so scared but also weirdly super turned on. I wasn't sure if she was breaking up with me or telling me she cheated or what.
I rushed home and she texted me to meet her in the bedroom, and when I did she was sitting on the bed with her laptop open beside her. She asked me straight "Are you a cuckold?" and I sort of stuttered "no." She told me to prove it and turned around her laptop. She had the same BlackedRaw video up from the other night and she played it again, and I couldn't help it. I got hard.
She said: "Yeah I knew it the other day, I'm dating a cuck." and she got up and left and told me not to follow her. Its been almost two hours and she wont text me back. I tried calling and she sent it to voicemail. I'm freaking out! I stopped blowing up her phone and decided to type this out. I'm really wondering if shes out with a guy…
What do I do? Should I accept that I'm a cuckold since I got hard to it twice and now I'm so turned on at the prospect she's with another man?