I shouldn’t have done it. My wife and I had been fighting, the kind of fight that leaves your chest tight and your mind racing. She stormed out of the house, slamming the door behind her, and I retreated to my home office, the air thick with unresolved tension. I logged into my computer, only to see that she hadn’t logged out of her profile. My anger flared, and before I could stop myself, I clicked on her browser. What I found was a drive filled with dated documents—diary entries. Most were mundane as I skimmed through them, but one from a few years ago changed everything for me.
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Years ago, my wife had cucked me with Dan. It had been a tumultuous time, filled with jealousy and desire. They’d had two periods where he would come over every weekend, I’d cook them fancy dinners, and then they’d fuck like newlyweds—sometimes in front of me, sometimes locking me out of the room until they were done. The first time, it became too much, and I called it off. But the spark between them never died. When I relented a couple of years later, they jumped at the chance. Eventually, things fizzled out. Dan remained in our friend group, and we still saw him regularly, but I thought the sexual parts had ended. Until I read her journal and discovered the third era.
We’d moved several hours away from our friends a few years ago. They’d visit quarterly, staying for about a week at a time. We’d host big events, and they’d take over the guest room, the office, and Dan would sleep on the sleeper sofa in the living room. I often went to bed early to wake up for my unreasonably early workdays while the party continued without me. It was a routine I never questioned—until now.
Her journal entry:
“I don’t want to forget a single thing. It’s been so long since I felt him. Since I’ve been touched like that. I fucked D again. Everybody else went to bed early (LAME!) and left me alone with him, so it wasn’t my fault really! I know I told W I wasn’t even attracted to him anymore, and I thought D was over me. He and W have been ogling me all week, and D has been making little comments that would make it a little harder to breathe. W would just laugh it off and slap my ass or they’d high five. I hate being objectified, but it was just doing something to me when he did it. And then I suddenly noticed we were nearly alone. Everybody else had gone to bed, except James. And James was nodding off. I found myself trying not to hope that he’d just go to bed. When Dan nudged him and suggested he go to bed, I felt butterflies in my stomach and tried not to think about the possibilities. After James left, Dan asked me if I wanted to keep watching [show redacted] or go to bed. I casually shrugged and said I could watch one more. He grinned.
I know that grin. Oh, there was that feeling down low in my abdomen. He sat down too close to me, and I tried not to look at him. To stare at his beautiful face. I felt every millimeter between us as an electrified field. I was trying to watch the show when he rested his hand on my leg. We were just friends. Friends can cuddle. I decided to just ‘go with the flow’ and put my legs across his lap. He had one hand resting on my thigh just above the knee and his other worked down to rub my feet and shin muscles. His hands felt amazing on my legs. The left hand created tension while the right loosened it. Then, he started moving his left hand lazily left and right along my thigh. His right hand seemed to lose a little focus every time his left went a little further up my thigh. This made me realize how short and loose my shorts were, how much of my leg was exposed to him, especially as fingertips began to brush along and then under the hem. I felt his boner growing against the back of my leg and tried in vain not to remember how that gorgeous dick felt inside of me. I didn’t want to encourage him, but I couldn't help pressing down into that bulge with my leg just a little.
Just as his fingertips began to reach the top of my thigh and gently brush the hairs around my labia, the episode ended. I thought this was the end and he would turn off the TV. We would get up and go our separate ways. I would either masturbate or wake W up for some quick sex before bed. But he didn’t move. His hands kept exploring and he just started talking to me about the episode. I tried to keep up in the conversation, but he found great satisfaction in the hesitations and breathlessness my voice would take on every time his fingers brushed a little closer around the edges of pussy. Eventually, he said something, I don’t even remember what, when his hand pressed up through my bush and his thumb found my clit. I just sat lay staring unable to respond while he stared at me wolfishly and slowly swirled his thumb around and over my clit. God, this man is amazing.
I’m not sure how long this lasted, but the next thing I know he seemed to in slow motion lean over me and climb on top of me while I moved my legs to accommodate him. In a frozen instant, his mouth was on mine and I was hungry. The world exploded. I kissed him and fumbled with his shorts. He seemed even more ravenous, clutching at me and kissing my mouth, neck, and shoulders like a starved man. I finally got his shorts undone and pushed them down with my hands and then feet. No sooner were they clear before I was had his dick in my hand, pulling him into me as I slipped my shorts to the side. It was like the first time all over again. I felt so good, I cried. I couldn't help it. He asked if I was ok, and I told him yes, that I missed this, that I never wanted it to end. He said he loved me and kissed me again as he fucked me. I’m not sure how long we lasted, but we came at the same time. It was magical. I know I have an IUD, but in that moment, I wanted him to get me pregnant. I wanted him to cum in me more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my whole life.
When we were done, we lay there for a while in our mess making out. Eventually, we became aware that there were other people in the house and pulled apart. He got up and took a shower. I eventually got up and went to bed with W. I felt awkward. I thought we were past all of this. I thought he was over me.
I know I told W that we were done with the cuckold and polyamory stuff. He seems to be happy with how things are now. I’m not sure how he’d react to that stuff now. I’m not sure if I should even tell him. What if this was a one-time thing? Just a happy little accident?”
My face burned as I finished reading. Betrayal coiled in my chest, twisting tighter with every word. How could she not tell me about this? She still liked to throw my past in my face, yet she’d kept this hidden from me. But as I processed what I’d read, a familiar heat stirred between my legs. My hand drifted down, unbidden, as I read through subsequent entries. My breath hitched as I stroked myself, the images from her journal playing vividly in my mind.
Just as I was about to cum, the front door closed softly. Panic surged through me as I quickly closed the browser and adjusted myself. She walked into the room, her eyes soft with apology, and ran into my arms for a hug.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, her voice trembling. “I love you so much.”
“I love you too,” I replied, my voice strained. “Hey, um, we need to talk.”
She squeezed me tighter, then giggled, her body pressing against mine. Her hand slid down, brushing against my still semi-erect crotch. “Mmmm, what about?” she purred, her lips brushing against my neck. “What were you up to while I was gone?”