“Hi"
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That was all it took to set my heart racing. We began texting back and forth, tentative greetings quickly turning into paragraphs of pouring out feelings.
She was 22 now. She'd graduated college. She'd moved back to SF and was starting a masters program. She was recently single, and taking time to be alone and process her feelings. Her relationship was a disaster. Her boyfriend had been jealous and controlling. Endless fighting. He'd forced her to delete most of her social media accounts. She'd made the mistake of telling him about me early on, and it became a serious issue for them. He'd accuse her of cheating with me every time she came home to visit her family.
"That's ridiculous." I couldn't believe the girl I'd known four years prior could have been diminished like that.
"I think I stayed because I felt guilty. I've never cheated on anyone. But I'd be lying if I didn't admit that I seriously contemplated messaging you every single time I stepped off that airplane. I did love him, but I knew deep down he wasn't the man I actually wanted all these years."
I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. I told her I'd never stopped thinking about her either. That admission didn't seem to make her feel any better.
"I looked you up one time and saw you had a girlfriend. I can't lie, I was so jealous of her and knew it was wrong of me. I thought about you all the time. My ex used to go through my phone and computer, so I had to delete all of our videos and text messages. I was so sad deleting them. When I saw you were in a relationship, I realized they were probably lost forever and that really sucked."
If I've ever come close to cardiac arrest, it was then. That feeling of inevitability again, like a wave of euphoria and anticipation, crashed over me. I was shaking from it.
"I don’t have a girlfriend anymore, and I never deleted our videos. It was wrong of me to keep them, I know. But I couldn't let go of those memories."
I waited patiently for her response. I saw the 3 dots that she was typing appear and disappear as she worked out what to say back to me. Finally, my phone dinged and I read her message.
"Please send them to me."
I did, and waited for her to reply. It took her a while again, and I assumed she was watching the videos. When she did eventually respond, she told me she needed some time to process. She hadn’t reached out to me for sex, she just wanted to catch up and maybe get closure on that part of her life. My heart sank, but I understood. I wished her the best, and truly hoped for it.
She texted me again a few days later:
"You are the best I've ever had. No one has ever come close. I can't deny it. I can't stop watching these videos. I can't stop cumming to you. I need to feel your hands on me, your lips on me, your cock inside me. I need you to fuck me like you did when I was just a girl."
Finally.
"You're still just a girl," I replied, and asked her when she'd like to meet.
She WAS still just a girl, but from 18 to 22, she'd gotten even more beautiful. Her ass had gotten fatter, her breasts had grown fuller, and the little dress she was wearing when she arrived at my apartment showcased them and the rest of her slender physique perfectly. She also had a new edge to her personality that hinted at the subtle ways she'd matured over the last four years. Some things however, hadn't changed at all… she was on her knees within 5 minutes of walking into my place.
"I haven't been fucked properly in years…" she breathed as she kissed my cock. "…and this dick is fucking huge. Please give it to me."
The sex that night was some of the best I've ever had. Both of us had been aching for each other for longer than we could admit. She was just as good as she was when I'd first met her. Her pussy was better than I could have ever remembered and she begged me to fill it with my cum again and again until we passed out in exhaustion. Now that she was living back in town, we started fucking more often. Once a week became twice a week, and that became her spending every weekend at my place.
I couldn't deny my growing feelings for her, but I was also nervous. For one, she was 10 years younger than me, and with our age gap I knew a relationship would be controversial for some of my friends and family. More than that, I was still scared of being hurt. I knew that I'd be diving off a cliff with her, and opening my heart would be opening myself up to submission. I'd only fallen hard twice before, with Daisy and Vanessa, and look where that got me. With Maya, I knew I'd be in even deeper trouble.
And that's how I felt when she told me she loved me. Like the idiot I am, I pushed her away. I stalled. I tried to slow things down. She couldn't handle it. She made it clear that it was too hard for her to keep fucking me and not be with me. She wasn't going to wait for me either. I had let her go once, and I thought I could do it again. I tried to do it again, but I was wrong.
We didn't talk for 2 more months. That entire time, I was stalking her socials, obsessing over what she was doing. I started noticing changes in her IG stories. She was dressing more provocatively. Taking thirst trap selfies in new places that I didn't recognize. New followers and new comments on her posts, all of them good looking men. I knew her past. I knew how easily she could get what she wanted. I knew at least one of these guys, maybe more, was fucking her instead of me.
She posted a story one night at around midnight. I noticed it only minutes after she posted it. A mirror selfie in an upscale apartment. She looked sexy, in a skimpy, jewel studded v-neck halter top that barely contained her breasts, and she looked drunk. Then I saw it, off to the side, cut off by the edge of the photo.. A tattooed arm and shoulder. Shirtless. Bulging muscles. That was all I could see, but it was all I needed to see. I found him quickly in her followers. It was easy to identify him. He was handsome, and fucking jacked. He'd posted a story himself, earlier that night. It was a quick video of her, sitting across a small table from him in a dimly lit bar or restaurant, wearing the same studded halter top from her post, clinking her cocktail against his and looking at him with a smile I'd seen her give me many times.
I broke out in goosebumps and cold sweats. Her post was 10 minutes old and he'd already been shirtless. What was she doing right now? Was she sucking his cock? Was he fucking her at this very moment. I just knew he was. I played through every scenario in my mind. I could almost see what he was doing to her. I could hear her moaning for him. I knew she was letting him fuck her raw.. she hated condoms. I jerked off the entire night imaging their illicit sex, because I couldn't deny it was happening. Jealously flooded through me. This was Daisy and Vanessa all over again. Only it was different, because I'd lost Daisy and Vanessa. I could have Maya. I didn't think it was too late. I struggled with it for a few weeks, a cycle of checking her stories and seeing her at that same apartment, shamefully indulging myself to the thought of her getting fucked by this guy and hating how I felt afterwards, and decided I couldn't take it any more. I reached out to her and asked if she'd like coffee.
We met at a Starbucks and I told her I missed her. She said the same. I told her I still wanted her. She told me that her feelings hadn't changed, and she couldn't sleep with me despite still wanting to. I told her that she could.. and I told her that I love her.
We wasted no time getting back to my apartment. She confessed that she had been seeing a few different guys, and that she should get tested before we do anything. I told her to get tested to be safe, but I wasn't waiting on the results. She texted the other guys that very minute and broke things off with them, and we spent the rest of the day fucking like rabbits.
I didn't tell Maya about my internet stalking or my fantasies, but they still lingered in my mind. Our relationship blossomed and the love was intense. The sex continued to be amazing. I was still in denial about the fetish that was growing malignantly inside my head, but because she'd been so honest with me during what she called "her slut era", I knew all about her past. She shared new stories she'd never told me, and we quickly realized how much we both got off when she did.
We'd occasionally role play and talk dirty in all sorts of ways. She loved that I was older, and I'd often be a teacher or other authority figure. We played out what would have happened if she'd messaged me while she was still with her ex, which I particularly enjoyed. And slowly, we began roleplaying her getting fucked by other guys.
I was still shy about it, and we often tiptoed around those fantasies. She asked me about it once, and I told her I enjoy talking about it, but I can't imagine ever being willing to actually share her, and she couldn't imagine it either, but we were unaware that a change was coming.
Our a relationship was growing stronger, and just after a year together, she came over and told me we needed to talk.
I could tell she was nervous, and I was too. "What's up?"
"I'm scared you're going to be upset at me."
"Now I am too but I promise I'll try not to be. What's wrong?"
"I was thinking about how we used to text back when I was still 18.. remember the app we used to sext and send videos on? I realized I never deleted my account when my ex made me delete my socials.. I only removed the app from my phone. I was able to guess my old password and I actually found all our old messages."
"Oh. That’s cool. But I don't see why that would make me mad," I questioned.
"Do you remember my friend Andre?" Of course I remembered Andre. "I had a bunch of saved messages from him too."
"Oh.. I see." My heartbeat quickened.
"Also… there are videos too. But I swear I didn't watch them, and I'll delete them right this second if that's what you want. I just don't want you to be upset or think I'm hiding things from you."
Oh my. I took a second to catch my breath. "Why didn't you just delete the messages the moment you saw they were there?"
She paused. "I.. don't know. I guess I just wanted to tell you first."
"You said 'if that's what I want.' Were you hoping I'd ask to seem them?"
"I.. yes. I think so."
My next four words changed my life forever. "Show them to me."
After confirming that I was sure I wanted this, and convincing myself that I was, we watched them together.
The first video was her on her knees, between his legs while he sat on a couch. His dick was flaccid, and honestly I thought it was unimpressive. It started with her mouth on his balls and his dick laying across her face. She smiled up at him, looking exactly how she looked when I first met her, and took his soft cock into her mouth. As she sucked him, I watched as his cock grew and swelled in her mouth. Before long, I realized how much I'd misjudged him. He was massive. My only reference to guess his size was how his dick looked next to her face compared to how mine did. I put him at only about 1/2 an inch longer than me, but she hadn't exaggerated his incredible girth. He looked almost as thick as my wrist. The video was 3 minutes long, and I watched her give her best effort to suck his cock. He was too thick for her to throat the way she did my own, but I was still amazed by how much of him she took into her mouth.
The second video was 2 minutes long, of her in doggy. All you could see was her ass, her back, and his cock slamming into her. His hips smacking loudly against her ass and her pussy queefing loudly for him. Somehow, impossibly, he looked even thicker now than he had in the blowjob video. For two minutes he pounded into her, and her pussy swallowed his size with incredible ease. My ears fixated on her cries and screams as she took him. He placed a giant hand on her lower back and it looked like it was almost the size of her torso. At the end, he pulled his cock out and set it on her ass, and for a few seconds, I got my first full sight of his veiny, bulging immensity. His impossibly fat head. My dick is very big, but this guy dwarfed me.
The third video was short, only 30 seconds or so. Shot horizontally, it was higher definition than the other two, and I recognized immediately that it had been shot with her digital camera. They were sitting on a couch, she was straddling him, and riding his cock. I could see his massive white thighs and knees, his balls, and his hands on her ass, guiding her steadily up and down his shaft. I could see her back, up to her shoulder blades, and her pony tale swishing back and forth. 20 seconds in, he grunted, buried his length into her, and his balls began noticeably pulsing. I was watching Andre cum inside my girlfriend. And then the video cut off.
The first time I watched the videos, I was numb. I couldn't tell if I felt anxious or excited, but I know I wasn't turned on. My dick was soft. I watched mostly with fascination, like I was watching a science experiment. Maya was incredibly nervous. I thanked her for showing me, and assured her I was okay. We ate dinner. I didn't think about the videos as we made love and she fell asleep beside me.
As she slept, my thoughts began racing. Images of what I'd witnessed flashed through my mind. I couldn't sleep at all. I took Maya's phone, and quickly downloaded the videos and sent them to my phone. I crept into the living room, put on headphones, and replayed them. I noticed things I hadn't noticed the first time. I noticed how much his cock glistened from how wet she was for him, white and creamy from her pussy. I noticed the way he groaned in pleasure while she sucked on his cock and how happy it made her. I replayed them again. I noticed that her moans sounded different than they did with me. Deeper, more guttural. I noticed the way she slammed back against him in doggy, inviting him to pound her harder. I noticed the audible "pop" sound her pussy made as he pulled his cock out of her. His magnificent, undeniably beautiful and intimidating, thick fucking cock. When I saved the videos to my gallery, I noticed how they sorted by date, and all of them were filmed within a few days of the videos she’d filmed back then with me.
I now knew what she was closing her eyes and imagining when she first told me about him all those years ago. I came watching them again and again that night, and fell asleep in the early hours of the morning, until I woke up to Maya shaking me awake.
"What are you doing out here?"
I confessed what I'd been up to. She was surprised, thinking from my initial reaction that I didn't enjoy the videos. I told her everything. How much I'd noticed, how hard I'd cum. I told her about my internet stalking when we weren't talking and my fantasies, and she listened and comforted me without judgement. She thought the entire thing was incredibly sexy.
I still couldn't imagine anything ever escalating from there. I thought the videos would be the extent of things, and for a long time, they were. I found myself watching them often and then eventually, they were the only thing I watched. A few months after first watching them, I realized I was having some penis dysphoria. My dick had always been huge to me and anyone else I'd showed it to. I'd seen a few dicks the size of Andre’s in porn, but I rarely watched that because it always felt so unrealistic to see something that big. But after seeing him fuck Maya, and how easily she took his size, I began to fell small and insignificant. We struggled sexually for a bit, for the first time. Eventually, I got a hold on things. I stopped watching the videos so frequently, only about once a month. I regained my confidence. We moved in together, and our relationship continued that way for another year, We still roleplayed about her fucking other men from time to time, and that sex was always hot, but I thought we'd fully explored that kink and found a comfortable place with it. How wrong I was.
We were at my family's house for dinner one night, when she got a text message from an unsaved number. "Hey Maya," it read. "How have you been? How is your Master's program going?"
She pulled me aside and showed me the message immediately. She wasn't sure, but she thought the number looked familiar, and she had a feeling it was one of the guys she had been seeing in the few months before we became official.
"Should I text back?"
I was nervous but I told her I didn't see the harm in it.
He quickly confirmed that her guess was right, it was a guy she fucked back then. They exchanged a few messages catching up, and she quietly updated me on their conversation. When she asked him why he decided to reach out to her, what he sent back had both of us in shock.
"Honestly, there's a couple videos we made together when we used to hang out, and after watching them again I just had to reach out to you."
She looked confused. She had no memory of ever making videos with him. She definitely never had any on her phone. She asked me what she should do, and when I told her, she texted him back the same five words she'd once sent to me:
"Please send them to me."
The night went on and we got distracted. She'd put her phone away and we stopped talking about it. My brother asked for a ride home, and Maya sat quietly in the backseat the entire drive. Once we dropped him off, I looked at her. "You've been awfully quiet back there."
Her face told me everything I needed to know. "He sent them." She'd saved the videos to her camera roll and watched them quietly in the backseat during the drive. We ran up to the bedroom immediately, eager to watch them them together.
On the way up to my place, she explained excitedly, "I get why I don't remember making a video. I think we filmed these the first night we ever had sex and he never sent them to me. We were both so fucking drunk that night, and I don't remember making them. I barely even remember the sex."
There were two videos, a long one and a short one. The long one was similar to the first video of Andre. Him sitting while she knelt between his legs. I noticed 3 things almost immediately.
The first thing I noticed, and it was obvious, was that she was very intoxicated. Maya is very slutty when she drinks.
The second thing I noticed made my heart climb up to my throat. He was fully naked, she was fully clothed, and she was wearing a top I recognized immediately but had never seen her wear in person: A skimpy, jewel studded, v-neck halter top. The time stamp showed 12:15 AM. I couldn't believe it. This was the same night I'd looked at her IG story and realized she was with a guy. I knew exactly who this guy was because I had been looking at his IG at the exact time he was recording this video. I'd cum so many times imagining her in that top on that night, but I was about to see what really happened play out before my eyes.
The third thing I noticed was his cock, and it held my attention the longest. This man had one of the most visually impressive dicks I've ever seen. He was fucking massive. He didn't have the terrifying girth that Andre did, but he was still significantly thicker than me. What Andre had on him in thickness, he made up for in length. He looked at least an inch longer than me if not more. If it wasn't 9 inches long, it was incredibly close. Maya had both hands wrapped around it's base and could have easily fit another two hands around it, and still have enough of his head left to suck on. And he was incredibly vascular. I've never seen so many bulging, thick and criss-crossing veins on another cock, but it made sense considering I knew how ripped this guy was. He had bulging veins everywhere else, why wouldn't his dick have them too?
"Jesus Maya. He's massive."
She gave me a naughty smile and shrugged. "I guess I’m just a lucky girl."
Sober Maya loves sucking cock. Drunk Maya becomes a fiend for it. The video was 8 minutes and 40 seconds of her drunkenly, sloppily, worshiping this man's dick. She did everything and more. She slapped it across her cheeks. She rubbed her face all over his balls. She told him over and over how huge he was, and told him it was the most beautiful cock she'd ever seen.. and honestly I couldn't disagree with her. She sucked and licked and gagged and spit all over his dick, fucked her own face on it as he groaned in response, and shoved as much of him down her throat as she could bare to swallow. I felt so fucking proud of her. My girl was a superstar for the camera. She loved every second of what she was doing to him. She loved the attention and she loved how hard he was for her. The video ended when she took his drool covered dick out of her mouth and told him to fuck her with it.
The second video was only 45 seconds long, and it broke my mind. She was laying prone on his bed. She was holding the camera herself and had it pointed selfie-style back at her face. His arms were on either side of her, holding himself in a plank position as he fucked her from behind. I couldn't see his face, but I could see his chest and abs as he powerfully pounded into her. I couldn't see his cock, but I could see her round ass arched up as much as she could, bouncing gently as she took thrust after thrust from him. I stared at her face. Her eyebrows were crunched together in concentration, but her eyes looked lost and unfocused, rolling around and back into her head. Her mouth hung open, her face was still covered in drool from the way she sucked his cock, and she could only moan every few seconds because her breath kept getting caught in her throat. It was 45 seconds of this massive man, ruthlessly pounding my girlfriend, while she laid there and took in every inch, making a face of pure, undeniable ecstasy.
She was staring at me when it ended. "You okay?"
I didn't say anything, but replayed the blowjob video and laid her down in the same prone position I'd just seen her in, listening to the noises she made as she sucked his cock. I came in her twice, without stopping for a break, before the video was even halfway over.
I let her sleep for a while and continued watching the videos before waking her up and fucking her some more. We were both worn out and half awake the next morning when her phone vibrated on the nightstand. It was him again.
"Hey Maya, didn't get a response from you so sorry if I upset you in any way. Just wanted to tell you why you were on my mind, but it's cool if you don't want to talk."
She looked at me and told me she had no idea what to say. "Should I just ignore it?"
I thought about it for a minute while she watched me think, and finally settled on what she should say back.
"Ask him if he'd like to fuck you again."