Free cuckold community
Sign up now!
First – Ron and Jenna
The Uber was still in my head when I hit their buzzer.
Three times.
Too many times.
I missed the button the first time because my hand was unsteady. I was still in the clothes I had gone out in, dark jeans, Chelsea boots, T shirt, leather jacket. My brown hair was a mess. I knew I looked bad.
It was around midnight. The hallway smelled like leftover Thai food and carpet cleaner.
The door opened.
Ron filled the doorway.
He was six foot three, broad through the shoulders and chest, with short brown hair and a plain, tired face that always looked more serious than he was. He had on an Iron Maiden shirt, boxers, and no shoes. Even dressed like that, he looked solid. Strong arms. Thick neck. Thick legs. He looked at me for one second and knew I was drunk.
“Jesus, man,” he said. “What happened?”
“Need to talk.”
He moved aside and let me in.
Their apartment was small, but better than most college apartments. White walls. Clean counters. Leather couch. A standing lamp in the corner. It smelled like weed, red wine, and Jenna’s perfume.
Jenna was on the couch with a wine glass in her hand.
She had straight black hair to her chest, a fringe across her forehead, and dark eyes behind square glasses. She was very pale. Very slim too, narrow shoulders, small chest, long legs folded under her. She had on sleep shorts and a thin white tank top. She looked at me once and sat up.
“Sit down,” she said. “You’re swaying.”
I sat in the chair across from them.
Ron picked up a PBR from the coffee table, handed it to me, then opened one for himself.
I looked at the can in my hand and said, “It’s Katie.”
Jenna’s face changed right away.
“What about her?”
I rubbed my forehead.
“Mark told me something.”
I had to start with the bar. There was no other way to explain why I had shown up like this.
An hour earlier, I had been standing at the bar with Mike and Mark. Mike was talking about an econ class. Mark was barely listening. He kept looking at me like he had something to say.
Then he said, “You know Katie’s been seeing Jack, right?”
My stomach dropped.
“What?”
Mike looked at him. “Katie? No way.”
Mark shrugged. “What do you mean, no way?”
“I mean Katie,” Mike said. “That Katie.”
Mark laughed at that.
“Yeah. That Katie.”
I stared at him. “What are you talking about?”
He took a sip of whiskey and leaned on the bar.
“Since that party Hannah dragged her to. The one you and Ron skipped because you wanted to stay in and watch basketball.”
I remembered the party.
I had stayed at Ron’s place. Jenna and Hannah had gone out. Katie had gone with them.
Mark kept talking.
“She hooked up with him that night. They’ve been meeting up on and off since.”
I looked at Mike. Mike looked back at me, then at Mark.
“You sure?” Mike asked.
Mark gave him a look.
“Jack told some people. He’s not exactly quiet.”
That made it worse.
Jack was older. One of the guys from Mark’s frat. He was one of those people who was always touching somebody’s shoulder, smiling at somebody’s girlfriend, acting like everything was already his. He had helped me once get a girl at a party and still found a way to insult me while doing it. “Not bad for a short guy”.
I looked back at Mark.
“You’re full of shit.”
“I’m not,” he said. “Ask around.”
Mike frowned. “Katie doesn’t seem like his type.”
Mark laughed again.
“No, she is exactly his type. Nice girl. Quiet girl. Virgin. He loves that.”
I felt my hand tighten around my glass.
Mark saw it and kept going anyway.
“He said she doesn’t let him do much, but every time they meet up she goes down on him. He thinks she’s going to sleep with him soon.”
For a second I could not hear the room.
Not because I believed every word that came out of Mark’s mouth. Because some of it was probably true.
Because I had gone out with her four times and had done almost nothing.
I was not even sure what I was angry about. Katie had every right to do whatever she wanted. We were not together. I had even hooked up with another girl after our first date, though I barely counted it. Still, hearing Jack’s name next to hers made me feel sick.
Back in Ron and Jenna’s apartment, I looked at both of them and said it again.
“Jack. She’s been seeing Jack.”
Jenna took a sip of wine.
“You knew?”
She set the glass down.
“I knew something was going on.”
I stared at her.
“And you didn’t tell me?”
She looked at me like I was being dramatic.
“It’s not my job to report on Katie’s sex life.”
I looked away and laughed once, short and ugly.
“Right.”
Ron sat on the arm of the couch, beer in hand, watching both of us.
Jenna leaned forward.
“You’re jealous,” she said.
“I know.”
“You should be. You like her.”
“I know that too.”
“No, John. You really like her.”
I dragged a hand through my hair.
“Can you not do this right now?”
“She likes you too,” Jenna said.
Ron nodded. “She does.”
I looked at him. “How do you know?”
“She asked me what your deal was.”
“When?”
“A few times.”
That landed hard.
“Then why is she with Jack?”
Jenna answered first.
“Because you’ve taken her out four times and still haven’t made a move.”
I looked at her.
“That’s your answer?”
“Yes,” she said. “That’s my answer.”
Ron drank from his can and said nothing.
Jenna kept going.
“She’s nineteen, John. She wants to feel desired. She wants to be wanted. Jack makes those things easy.”
I stared at her.
“But Jack?”
“Yes,” she said. “Jack. Bad choice. I didn’t say I approve it”
She reached across the table, took my cigarette pack without asking, and slid one out. I watched her do it and did not stop her.
Ron shifted beside her.
His jaw tightened.
“You’re talking out of both sides of your mouth,” he said.
Jenna turned to him.
“What?”
“You told Katie not to sit around waiting for him,” Ron said. “You told her to live a little. To stop building her whole life around one guy.”
“And now I’m telling him to stop wasting time,” Jenna said. “That’s not a contradiction.”
“It kind of is.”
She rolled her eyes.
“No, it isn’t.”
Ron stood up.
He looked bigger when he was angry. He had that kind of build. Big hands. Thick arms. Weight in his shoulders. He pushed a hand through his hair and looked at me.
“She’s acting like she isn’t in this,” he said.
Jenna gave him a hard look. “I am in this. That’s exactly why I’m saying it.”
Then she looked back at me.
“Katie is my friend. So are you. If you keep doing this thing where you wait and wait and act like wanting her is some giant moral issue, then yes, I’m going to tell her to move on.”
Ron laughed once.
“Tell him the rest.”
Jenna took a drag from the cigarette and blew the smoke out to the side.
“John,” she said, “do you still love her?”
I nodded before I even thought about it.
She watched my face.
“If she keeps seeing Jack, or anybody else, are you still going to love her?”
“I don’t know.”
She reached across and took my hand.
“Yes, you do.”
Ron spoke over her.
“And you told her he’s not going to go out and actually get over her with some other girl.”
Jenna looked at me and ignored Ron.
“It’s not that I think you can’t get girls,” she said. “You can. You’re attractive. Girls like you. You just don’t do anything unless you really care, and when you really care”
I did not answer.
Because that part was true.
She went on.
“Katie is different. She still has that whole first love idea in her head. The right person. The right way. The right story.”
Ron cut in.
“And at the same time she wants to stop feeling inexperienced.”
Jenna nodded.
“Yes. Exactly.”
She looked back at me.
“That’s why she’s confused. She wants the safe version, and she wants the other version too. Those two things don’t go together.”
I took a cigarette from the pack. Ron pushed the ashtray toward me. Jenna immediately stole that cigarette too.
I looked at her.
“You’re unbelievable.”
She smiled a little. “I know.”
I lit hers, then mine.
She leaned back into the couch and crossed one leg over the other.
“What I’m saying,” she said, “is that Katie is trying to solve two different problems at once. She wants the person she actually likes, and she wants the experience she thinks she’s missing.”
I smoked and looked at the floor.
“I still don’t get what you want me to do.”
Ron answered before Jenna could.
“She thinks Katie likes you enough to keep coming back to you. She also thinks Katie is stupid enough to keep messing around with Jack while she figures herself out.”
“That is not how I said it,” Jenna said.
“It is what you mean.”
Then Ron looked at me.
“And she thinks you’ll still be here. That’s the part she isn’t saying.”
I looked at Jenna.
Her face did not change.
“Did you tell Katie that?”
“I told her you care about her,” she said. “Because you do.”
“That’s not the same thing.”
“No,” she said. “It isn’t.”
She leaned forward again. Her eyes were steady on mine.
“You act like this is only about Katie. It isn’t. It’s about you too. You built this whole image of her in your head. Sweet. Innocent. Different from everybody else. And now that image got cracked.”
I sat there with the cigarette between my fingers and said nothing.
Because again, part of that was true.
I hated that she could say it out loud.
She softened her voice, but not by much.
“If you want her, go to her. Talk to her. Stop circling around this and do something.”
I took a long drag, then exhaled slowly.
“I don’t know,” I said. “That’s the problem. I really don’t know.”
Ron had been quiet for too long. I could tell he was getting angry with me, not just with Jenna. His whole body had changed. His shoulders were tight. His mouth was set. He looked at me like he was deciding whether to be careful or honest.
Then he chose honest.
“This is where I disagree with her,” he said.
I looked up.
He stepped closer.
“You’re not just upset because it’s Jack. You’re upset because you had Katie on a pedestal.”
“Shut up.”
“No. You did.”
“Ron.”
“You did,” he said again. “You liked that she was sweet. You liked that she was inexperienced. You liked that she felt safe to you.”
“Fuck you.”
His face tightened.
“I’m serious.”
I stood up too.
I was not small, but next to Ron I always felt leaner and lighter than I actually was. I was fit, but not built like him. Good shoulders. Flat stomach. Clean shaven. Sharp jaw. A face people usually liked once I smiled. None of that mattered right then. He was still taller. Still heavier. Still one step from blocking me out completely.
“That’s not what this is,” I said.
“Then what is it?”
“It’s Jack,” I said. “It’s him. It’s the fact that she likes me and still went to him. It’s the fact that I was stupid enough to think this was simple.”
Ron did not move.
“Maybe. But if Katie had done the exact same thing with some sweet, polite, harmless guy, would you be reacting like this?”
I opened my mouth and stopped.
Because I did not know.
And he saw that.
His voice got lower.
“You’ve never had sex. You’re insecure about it. Fine. I get it. But don’t turn that into some judgment about her.”
My face got hot.
“I’m not judging her.”
“Are you sure?”
Jenna stood up fast.
“Okay. Enough.”
Neither of us looked at her.
Ron kept his eyes on me.
“I love you, man. I do. But you made her into something clean and perfect in your head, and now you’re acting like she betrayed that. Maybe she didn’t betray anything. Maybe you just had her wrong.”
I could feel my pulse in my face.
“It’s not like that,” I said. Then, because I was drunk and angry and too honest to stop myself, I added, “Or maybe part of it is. I don’t know.”
That shut him up for one second.
Then I said, “We’ve been going on dates for four weeks and I thought that meant something.”
Here is the last part redone, with those pieces kept in.
Ron looked at me with his whole face set.
“Yeah,” he said. “She’s blowing him. That’s what he said, right? Because he actually makes a move, unlike you. You sit there waiting for the girl to do it for you. And yeah, Katie is a human being. She’s sexual. Grow the fuck up.”
“Ron,” Jenna .
He did not stop.
“You know what she told Jenna? She said she can’t help it. Because he has a big thick dick and every time he takes it out, she ends up on her knees and can’t resist it. So what? Does that suddenly make her a different person? No. It just makes you insecure.”
“Ron,” Jenna shouted. “Bedroom. Now.”
That cut through him.
He looked at her, then at me. His face changed fast. The anger dropped and something embarrassed took its place.
He stood there for a second, breathing hard.
Then he said, “I’m sorry, man. I just… I’m sorry.”
He stepped in, gave me a quick hug, hard and awkward, then let go and walked to the bedroom.
The door shut behind him.
I stayed where I was.
I kind of knew why he had reacted like that.
Jenna had let part of it slip once, months ago. Before that, I had thought she and Ron were one of those high school couples who had done everything first with each other. That was not really the case. I just had not understood how deep it went.
Jenna took another cigarette from my pack.
“He thinks you pity him,” she said. “And judge me.”
“I don’t.”
She lit the cigarette and looked at me over the flame.
“Don’t you?”
“I said I don’t.”
“Then why are you judging Katie for blowing some guy?” she asked. “Why are you acting like you wouldn’t love her if she wasn’t a virgin? Why are you acting like you wouldn’t go for her if she slept with someone tomorrow?”
“It’s not that.”
“I know it’s not,” she said.
I looked at her.
She took a drag and tapped ash into the tray.
“Because unlike Ron, I know that’s how you rationalize things. It’s not how you actually feel them.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means Ron has a short memory,” she said. “He forgot where he was a few months ago, when we almost broke up.”
Second – John and Jenna
“Tell me,” I said.
My voice came out rough. I was half smiling. The beer had me loose and stupid and a little mean. Part of me wanted the story because I was curious. Part of me wanted it because Jenna had accused me of judging her and pitying Ron, and maybe she was right. Maybe hearing something ugly would let me feel better than both of them.
“I won’t judge,” I said. “Swear.”
Jenna laughed.
She was very drunk by then. Her cheeks were pink. Her glasses sat crooked on her nose. She reached for the wine bottle, knocked it over, caught it before it tipped all the way, then started laughing harder.
“Oh my God,” she said. “Okay. Fine. You want gossip? You have to smoke with me.”
She tossed me the pack. I lit one for her and one for myself. She took a drag, coughed right away, then tucked her legs under herself on the couch.
“So,” she said. “Ron and me.”
I waited.
“In high school we were not really friends. Not like that. He was the huge quiet guy in the library playing Magic with his nerd friend. I was somewhere else.”
“Where was somewhere else?”
She looked at the cigarette for a second, then said it flat.
“I lost my virginity at fifteen. Summer camp. Counselor named Tyler. He was nineteen.”
I stared at her.
“Yeah,” she said. “Exactly.”
She took another drag.
“It was bad. It hurt. I bled on my shorts. He gave me his T shirt after and basically never spoke to me again.”
“That’s fucked.”
“I know.”
She said it lightly, but her face changed when she said it.
“The weird part is that after that I wanted sex more, not less. The sex was terrible, but I just wanted it, and the worst part was already gone.”
She reached for the vodka, poured some into the wine glass, and drank it.
“So I started sleeping with guys,” she said. “One guy from swim. Then his friend. Then a senior. Then parties. Then more parties. By senior year I think it was fifteen or sixteen guys. Maybe more. I stopped counting.”
I watched her. She was not showing off, she was saying it like it was nothing, but all with her high pitched sweet voice. I was shocked. Jenna? Sleeping around?
“At first I felt used,” she said. “Then I realized I was using them too.”
“For what?”
She shrugged.
“Attention. Power. Relief. Curiosity. The feeling of being wanted. The feeling of thick cock inside me pouring its juices. Guys slapping my ass and making me feel small. The rush of doing forbidden things no one thought it would.”
The room was quiet for a moment.
Then she smiled a little.
“I just liked sex. Getting fucked.”
I swallowed. Hearing this doll looking girl speak like this was getting me horny.
“How many did Ron know about?” I asked.
“0 at first.”
She drew her knees closer.
“He asked me out in February of senior year. Just walked up to me in the hallway with a folded note in his hand. He was shaking.”
“That sounds like him.”
“It was adorable,” she said. “I thought I knew exactly how that was going to go. I thought I’d sleep with him and move on.”
“But you didn’t.”
“No.”
Her voice dropped.
“He was too kind. Too careful. He remembered little things. He got me hot chocolate because I said once that I hated coffee. He listened to me”
She gave a small smile.
“I liked him almost immediately. That was also the problem.”
“So you waited.”
“I waited.”
“Why”
“Because girls know that you kind of keep a guy by holding to the forbidden fruit”
She looked down at her glass.
“Then I found out he was a virgin.”
“How?”
She laughed once.
“We were in his car. I touched him through his jeans and he froze. Completely. Then he admitted it.”
She shook her head like she still found it hard to believe.
“This giant eighteen year old boy with shoulders like that, and no one had ever touched him. And instead of being turned off, I felt protective. I didn’t want to be careless with him.”
I leaned forward.
“So what happened?”
“We stayed slow for a while,” she said. “Holding hands. Kissing. All of that. Then prom. He was so handsome in that tuxedo, and I was wearing this beautiful blue dress. I was his first.”
She said it simply.
“He tried to be all gallant, going hard. He sucked at it, but I loved it, because I loved him.”
“And like, did you know he might view different?”
“I suspected. I mean, deep down I wanted to believe he knew and didn’t care. That that specific part didn’t matter, as it shouldn’t.”
She got more serious then, pressing her lips.
“I did know he view me differently. I just did t have the guts to tell him. I told myself ‘it’s 2017, none of this matters at all’. But if it did to him? I should have. He would have stayed.”
Then, put her hands in her mouth to her hysterical high laugh and looked at me.
I asked “what?”
“Promised you won’t tell Ron I told you this?”
“Of course.”
“Ron asked me like 15 times before our first time if I was sure, if I really wanted to and all. It was so sweet, but I just wanted to eat him alive at that point. And honestly, only a virgin like him wouldnt have noticed what I looked like down there.
There I was, naked, my legs open, my pussy soaking, and this sweet giant looking at me like I’m the most precious thing in the world. I didn’t need to tell him to go down on me, he just went and said ‘it’s so beautiful. So different’. And I’m like ‘yea of course. You like hentai little pussy and I’m wrecked”
I was looking at her, shocked.
“Seriously John, he sucked my labia like it was the most flavorful thing in the world. And like, it was not ‘good’, but it was, because I liked that he liked it. He liked my dark labia, that I used to hide.. oh John you are such a virgin.”
“I took him to me fast and made him slide. I wanted to make it sweet, but his cock slid into me in one swift motion, making me gasp. Still, he asked me if I was liking it. If it was hurting. I touched my clitoris while he went and after he came he just continued touching it. Our sex life was amazing. He was learning so much…”
“Until” I asked
And then she turned serious.
“During the summer one of my old hookups saw us at a party and decided to be disgusting. He made a joke about my body. About the way I look down there. About things I used to do. He said, and I quote ‘that used butterfly pussy’. Ron heard all of it.”
I did not say anything.
She tapped ash into the tray.
“That was the first time I saw Ron look at me like I had tricked him,” she said. “He thought I lied even if I didn’t, I never told him anything because he never asked.”
“You almost broke up.”
“Yeah.”
“Because he thought you were innocent like him, you look like it.”
And she did. I already knew she had partners before Ron, she let it slip once, and even then I was shocked because everyone thinks they are the typical high school couple.
She looked at me for a second.
“Yes,” she said. “Or at least he wanted to be first in a way that felt important. He wanted innocence. He wanted to feel special. Or maybe he didn’t want to hold hands with a girl that made every guy laugh at him. I don’t blame misogyny, I just hate that it affected me so much at one point.”
Her voice was calm, but there was anger under it.
“He got me. All of me.”
I looked down at my beer.
“That’s why he snapped tonight,” she said. “He heard you and thought you were doing the same thing he did. And worse, that means you would also laugh at his back.”
“Was I?”
She held my eyes.
“A little.”
I let out a breath.
Jenna took another drink and kept going.
“That’s the part boys still don’t get. Girls our age are having sex. Learning things. Making mistakes. Good luck finding a 19 year old girl with less than 5 bodies. Meanwhile, the sweet, decent guys are the inexperienced ones now. We know that. We are fine with it. Some even like it.”
She pointed the cigarette at me.
“You think Katie cares that you’re a virgin because she is also a virgin?”
I said nothing.
“She doesn’t,” Jenna said. “That is not it. It’s what it actually means.”
I looked at her confused.
“She likes that you’re inexperienced,” she said. “Not because she’s a virgin too. But because she loves you, and that also proves you are not a douche. And also, in my opinion, she likes the idea of not being the small girl. She still has this romantic idea, hence why she is stil saving herself. If she could only let that part go…”
The room felt smaller all of a sudden.
I shifted in my seat.
Jenna noticed. Of course she noticed.
She leaned back into the couch.
“But that’s the thing. Most guys, like you, the good ones, leave in confusing times. The girl you wil marry probably already fucked more guys than they can imagine, while they will get there virgins. You masturbate looking at pornstars with open pussies, used, big labia, you crave it, you want that. But then you freeze when that shows up. And then we get this limbo of single girls and guys that could be together if you just admitted it”
I rubbed a hand over my face.
My body had already reacted to what she was saying, and I hated that she could probably tell. It made everything worse. The jealousy. The humiliation. The fact that I was still listening.
Jenna’s voice softened.
“She wants tenderness from you,” she said. “She wants to feel like she matters. She wants someone she can relax with. Someone who won’t make everything feel like force.”
I looked at her.
“And you,” she said, “want her to be less real than she is.”
That landed.
She let it sit for a second, then said, “Ron is mad because he knows what it feels like to realize you were not first and hate yourself for caring. Part of him still cares. He hates that too.”
She looked down at her hand around the glass.
“He thinks of himself as later in the story,” she said. “He thinks of himself as number twenty, or whatever is number the number of guys I’ve fucked, and he hates that it means anything to him at all. He wants to be above it. He isn’t.”
She looked back at me.
“I wish he loved me without that part. I really do.”
The alcohol had made her looser, but not less sharp. If anything, she was sharper because she had stopped trying to be careful.
Then she said, “But you are softer than Ron.”
I gave a dry laugh. “That sounds insulting.”
“It isn’t.”
She reached over and took my hand.
“You think more. You are kind.”
I looked at her. Put my hands on my face and said “she sucked Jacks dick. How can I? And she told people it’s because she can’t resist is thick cock…”
She looked at me with a grin, she loves this part, where she gets an opportunity to mock me.
“About that. That’s not an issue either. First, I’ve had too many big cocks to know that’s not important. It’s just how body reacts in a way when we see them. But it’s not important. And thrust me, Ron is not lacking at all there. But what makes sex with him good is that I actually love him. And besides. She already knows what you look like and she prefers it to Jack”
“How would she know?”
She smiled in a way I did not like at all.
“Because of that moment last semester when me and Hannah put you to bed.”
My face went hot.
“What?”
She did not look sorry.
“You told Katie?”
“Hannah did,” Jenna said. “And Katie got defensive immediately.”
I could feel my whole body go rigid.
“What did she say?”
Jenna’s expression softened.
“She said bigger is not better. She said big hurts sometimes. Just retelling what she heard once. She said you sounded perfect.”
I did not move.
Jenna watched my face.
I did not answer.
She squeezed my hand once and let go.
“Here’s the other truth,” she said. “If what you really want is to be first, to get the innocent version, to get her untouched, then you need to move now. Tonight. Tomorrow. Before Jack gets there first.”
I looked at her.
She was drunk enough that her words blurred a little at the edges, but the point was sharp.
“You can’t sit here forever,” she said. “Either go after the real Katie, or admit you wanted a fantasy.”
She leaned back, almost slipping sideways into the couch cushions, then laughed at herself.
“I am so drunk,” she said. “This is probably too much.”
I stood up. A little too fast.
My head was buzzing. My chest was tight. My thoughts were worse than before, not better.
“I should go.”
“Yeah,” she said, looking up at me through crooked glasses. “You should.”
I took a step toward the door.
Then she said, “John.”
I turned.
“She defended you,” Jenna said. “Remember that.”
I stood there for a second.
Then I left.
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.