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This happened last month and I’m still processing how I feel about it.
I’m 19, Singaporean, my boyfriend (27) and I have been exploring this cuckold dynamic for a few months. Started with just me and another guy while he watched. Then he mentioned wanting to see me with two guys. I said that was crazy. He kept bringing it up. We found two guys on an app friends, both 28, expats, leaving Singapore soon so no ongoing complication. Met them at a hotel bar first, drinks, chemistry check. They were respectful, not pushy, understood the situation. We went up to their room. My boyfriend sat in the armchair in the corner, fully clothed, just watching. The guys started with me together one kissing me, the other behind me, hands everywhere. They undressed me slowly, taking turns, making sure I was comfortable.
Then they took me together. One underneath, one on top. I’d never done that before. The sensation was overwhelming being completely filled, stretched, surrounded. I kept looking at my boyfriend, checking he was okay. He was hard, stroking himself through his pants, nodding at me to keep going. They switched positions a few times. Took turns finishing inside me IUD, we had all verified beforehand. When they were done, they went to shower together, gave us space. My boyfriend practically attacked me. Fucked me on the hotel bed, reclaiming me, asking me over and over how it felt, if I liked it, if I wanted to do it again. I came harder than I ever had, still wet with them inside me. Now he wants to arrange three guys. I don’t know if I can handle that. Two was intense but manageable. Three feels like too much. But when I touch myself, I think about it. About being completely overwhelmed, used, filled in every way.
Is this normal? To want more but also be scared of it?

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