On the path of becoming a cuck [cuckold’s perspective]

First time she 39F cheated on me 40M was at the beginning of our relationship. She went on a trip with her family to visit long distance relatives. One night her and same age cousins decided to go to a bar. She did call me to let me know and after that it was nothing but texts. I tried to call her several times but she did not answer and eventually stopped replying texts. She called me once she went back to her aunt’s house where she was staying but didn’t talk much since she didn’t want to wake people up. She came back and acted normally and it wasn’t until after 1 1/2 years passed she told me. I was mad but eventually worked things out. Fast forward we get married and move to a different town. She starts going to a gym, makes new girlfriends and they go to a concert together. That night she didn’t get home until 4am. When she walked in, I woke up and saw her. Messy makeup and hair, smell of alcohol and cigarettes (she didn’t smoke at least until that night). I asked her what happened and why she was home so late. She tried to talk about other things but I asked her again. Her answer was “you know where I’ve been”. Silence. I had no reaction. She left her purse on the kitchen counter top and walked in the shower. To my surprise a pack of cigarettes inside. I confronted her and she told me the whole story. At the concert they met one of the gym instructors and he was hanging out with the girls. He was flirting with all the girls but specially with my wife. After the concert, he offered her a ride (she was going to take an uber home) and she accepted. They ended up back in his apartment. I was mad but also turned on for whatever reason. My wife noticed but didn’t say anything until she came out of the shower. She tried to hug me but I didn’t want to. She then said for me to stop acting like I didn’t like it. I told her to shut up and went to bed but couldn’t sleep.