First 3 way experience none for me [22m]

First time post in here but just wanted to share one of my humiliating stories I want Brutal honesty about of what you think of it to,any ways

A little over a year ago I got invited to a 3 sum with a guy and a girl he had met from his past and I don’t ever really get laid so I was interested right away. It was about a 2 hour drive to her so I spent the whole car ride getting excited. Right away when we got there the other guy went right in for her in front of me taking dominance and immediately I felt nervous, it quickly went to the bedroom and we all got naked but I could not get hard at all. Nothing. I tried to go from behind while she sucked him off but I was smashing my limp pathetic excuse of a cock into her butt crack not even getting close to putting it in at all. she then flipped over and stated ridding the other guy while I laid there frustratedly groping my tiny little nub. That went on for a good while until she felt so bad she got up walked me out to the kitchen and sat me down to play with some play sand she had had out and talked to me like a sad child while I could here the other guy in the other room talking on the phone about me. I suggested that maybe I could go get some gas station Bonner pills maybe that would work, while I left she went back in the room with him. I got them and took them they still did nothing. Once I was back I returned to the door locked and could just hear there moans, the only thing I could think of was to watch some porn maybe that could help I ended up getting down porn hub and other site rabbit holes of sissy and other diaper sissy porn. I also have a abdl fetish and was still just frustratedly playing with my tiny little nub while that was all I could think about. I really wanted to try again I felt so nervous and embarrassed. I knocked on the door and they let me back in but to none of our surprises it was the exact same thing only this time it just felt even sadder that I really could just not get any thing I even herd her wispser about how small it was. Eventually I just walked my self out and laid down on the living room couch and squirmed around to the sound of there moans. I finally fell asleep but when I woke up all the diaper porn I had watched must have gotten to me because I had soaked my pants and her couch. Ive been cucked a few other times but this was by far my most embarrassing ???? looking back on it though it gets me so hot thinking about it though just that I was so pathetic and phi sadly couldn’t do a thing about it.