Got caught cheating with coworker but BF wants to watch instead [GF’s perspective]

few weeks ago, this awkward scenario happened. i wasn’t even planning to cheat, like at all. i was just hanging out with this guy i’ve known for a while at work. he’s cute, flirty, but i always kept it friendly. that day my boyfriend had to work late, so i invited this guy over to chill. we were just talking, drinking a little, and omg we got way too comfortable on the couch. he started touching my leg, and i was like wtf am i doing but i didn’t stop him. one thing led to another and suddenly we’re kissing. my heart was pounding so hard because i knew this was wrong but i was so turned on.

so i’m on the couch with his hands all over me and then omg… the front door opens. i literally froze mid-kiss. my boyfriend walks in and just stares at us. i swear i almost passed out. i thought it was over for me, like pack your bags girl, you’re done. i jumped up and started saying omg babe i’m so sorry but he just stood there quiet. then he sits on the chair, looks at us, and says, keep going. i was like HUH??? FR??? i thought he was joking but his face was dead serious.

it was the most awkward silence for like 10 seconds and then the guy looks at me like should we? and my boyfriend nods. so yeah, we went from caught cheating to him literally watching me cheat. i can’t even explain the mix of guilt and excitement i felt. i got back on the couch and the guy starts kissing me again, and i could feel my boyfriend just staring. it was so weird at first but omg it turned me on so much. then the guy pulls my shorts down and i swear i heard my boyfriend take a deep breath like he was preparing for it.

the first time he slid into me i almost moaned out loud because holy shit he was big. like way bigger than my boyfriend. i felt so bad thinking that while my bf was watching but omg my body didn’t care. the guy started thrusting and i kept looking at my boyfriend and he was just stroking himself, no anger, no yelling, just watching me take it. ngl that made me lose it completely. i was moaning like crazy while holding onto the couch and this guy was fucking me so deep i almost cried. my boyfriend was even giving tips like harder, give it to her. wtf is my life.

after we finished i couldn’t even look either of them in the eye. my legs were shaking so bad i just sat there like omg did that really just happen. and my boyfriend just smiles and says next time warn me so i can grab popcorn. like what?? i’m still trying to process it honestly.