so this is a story about how i was cucked in college, and my girlfriend went on to marry the guy.
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we started dating in high school. i was already really into cucking, but i didn’t really know the word for it yet, but i was obsessed with my girlfriend having sex with another guy. i would ask her to imagine having sex with someone else while i was fucking her. she was into it. but i was really, really, really into it.
by the way, she was like 5’7”, skinny, C cups, dark straight hair — really cute, sweet faced girl. we were 18, i was totally in love with her. we had a million inside jokes.
anyway we both moved away to separate colleges. but we wanted to stay together, as naive 18 year olds do. we’d watch each other masturbate over video chats and our dirty talking intensified further and i encouraged her to have sex with someone else — as long as i got to watch.
well, it actually ended up happening. like pretty much within two weeks of me giving her a hall pass.
i remember it really vividly. she texted me and said she made out with a guy friend one night. okay, okay, it was like a knife to the chest, but i was curious. what did he look like? how long had they been talking?
first of all, he was 6’4” and really athletic. they met in the dining hall, he came up to her first, weeks ago, she didn’t think much of it except that he was cute. then she went out one night with a huge group of friends and he was there, they were drunk, and he kissed her and they made out.
she asked if she could sleep with him and i said yes.
literally two days later — she tells me it’s actually happening and he was already in her room. they were drunk — she sends me a snapchat of herself, just a selfie, saying “i love you”. she was wearing a bra. i fucking couldn’t believe it. i just couldn’t put my phone down, waiting for the next update.
finally i get something. i open it and it’s a picture of her laying naked on the bed, smiling, her arms stretched behind her. obviously her friend took it. i couldn’t fucking believe it. i immediately message her back and ask her can i watch?
i get another snap. this time she’s holding the camera and she’s grinning, licking her lips — she aims the camera down and i see that he’s fucking her. his cock was huge. he was wearing a condom, he was sliding in and out of her.
tell me when you’re finished is the next thing i said. after half an hour or so she finally texts me back and she says “it was amazing”. she sends me a nude of her in the bathroom.
i was totally heartbroken that she actually did it but i was so turned on. i called her that night until 4 am and i had so many questions. how big was his cock? i don’t know, 8 or 9 inches, she said. what did it feel like? really full, she said. how did he fuck you. missionary, and then sideways. did you cum? twice.
can i do it again, she asked.
i was so so devastated but so turned on that i told her to she could keep fucking him.
over the next month i was just inundated with porn from her. basically every day.
some really crazy videos stand out to me:
one she took was of her doing reverse cowgirl in front of a mirror. just watching her bounce on his cock was incredible. he looked huge and she was taking all of it. that’s when i realized the extent of our size difference — he was twice my size.
the other really crazy video was her face in doggy. she was so flushed and so into it, biting her lip and quivering. he pulled out and came on her ass. which meant he wasn’t wearing a condom. this wasn’t something we talked about and i was really hurt at first, but eventually i let it go.
i always asked a lot of questions. what they did. how he fucked her. they had sex in positions that we never tried. he could pick her up and fuck her against the wall. i would ask her, how did he cum?she would say, on my chest, or in my mouth, on my back. one video was from her point of view, as he pulled out and came all over her chest.
i hated it but i loved it.
“he’s rough with me,” is one thing she told me that really stuck out to me. i asked if she loved it. of course she did. i asked if she loved it more than having sex with me. i told her she could be honest and she said yes. how much more, i asked. “quite a lot” was all she said.
i knew things were coming to an end when one day she sent a picture of the two of them in front of the bathroom mirror, naked, he was standing behind her, his hands on her waist and she was in his arms. i realized they were in love and she deserved it. she was a really, really good girlfriend.
she sent a video that night, one that he took of her fucking her from behind, a close up of his cock sliding into her. the lips of her pussy wrapped around his cock like nothing i had ever seen before, and i just kept looking at that and her asshole, just exposed to him. they were in the dark but the camera flash was on and it just looked so unbelievably hardcore. she was screaming, crying with pleasure, in a way that i just never heard before. she glanced back at the camera and the light bounced off her eyes like a wild animal and i could see that she was completely drunk with passion.
then, she was on her back, her legs up as he fucked her in missionary. again, the camera flash made everything so scathing, scientific, visceral. i watched as his massive cock slid in and out of her pussy. his hand was on his neck. she looked like a doll. she looked she was in the most intense pleasure of her life, her eyes squinting from the light, her face flushed. her mouth was wide open, crying with pleasure. then he pulled out and came all over her. so, so, so much cum shooting all over the body and up to the face of my beloved girlfriend.
i didn’t leave my dorm room for two whole days. i just stayed in this haze and masturbated and cried and masturbated and cried.
we broke up that week. i just couldn’t do it. in many ways it honestly had nothing to do with him, i actually just didn’t see a future with her, either. we lived thousands of miles apart and life was changing so fast. i just didn’t want to string her along, and she seemed like she was becoming more and more distant. it was natural and it was okay. i had to let her go. i had to let myself go. i was depressed for an entire month, but i survived. i felt unlovable, ashamed, and lonely and confused.
incidentally, around this time, i told a female friend everything that had happened and she was so intrigued by the whole thing. she was also a queer studies major and she had a lot of advice. i felt a lot less ashamed and it really helped me come to terms with everything that had happened. i learned more about kink and i realized that there was totally nothing wrong with me, and if anything, i had achieved something a lot of people fantasize over or wish to experience.
i reached out to my ex years later during the pandemic, i was wondering how she was doing. it was nice to hear from her. she said if i was ever in town that we could grab a drink. it was friendly. we were both working professionals by then.
I saw that she got married this year, to him. a beautiful, lavish wedding, her dad walking her down the aisle, them laughing with all their friends and family. she looked beautiful, and so did he.
was i heartbroken this time?
not at all. my life had moved on, and it turned out really well.
actually, my feeling was more like incredulous disbelief, and a weird kind of pride and nostalgia.
i couldn’t believe that 1. i once had sex with her and 2. i watched them fuck, a lot. and now they made their vows.
i couldn’t be happier.

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