the first time my ex boyfriend watched someone else fuck me [gf]

he said he just wanted to watch. that’s how it started. we’d been talking about fantasies for a while, and one night after a couple drinks, i told him i had a curiosity about being with someone else. not cheating. not hiding it. just… letting go while he watched me come apart.
he didn’t say anything at first. just stared at me, like he was trying to read if i was joking. but a few days later, he brought it up again. “what if we actually tried it?”
we found a guy on one of the apps. nothing crazy. clean, older, respectful. honestly, he wasn’t even that hot to me. but i said yes anyway.
the night it happened, my hands were shaking. my boyfriend sat in the corner chair, quiet, barely blinking. the other guy undressed me slowly, like he already knew what to do. he kissed down my neck and cupped my tits while i tried not to make eye contact with either of them.
but then he got on top of me and i felt his cock push in deep. my boyfriend exhaled. not loud, but just enough for me to hear it. i moaned and closed my eyes and let the other guy fuck me like i wasn’t even taken.
he was bigger. thicker. rougher. he grabbed my hips and made the bed creak, and all i could do was take it. i glanced over and saw my boyfriend’s hand in his lap, rubbing through his jeans. i don’t know what turned me on more—being used, or knowing he was getting off to it.
when i came, it wasn’t quiet. i wasn’t trying to be sexy anymore. i was just loud and messy and maybe even a little slutty. my legs shook and i didn’t even notice when the guy pulled out. i laid there panting, thighs dripping.
my boyfriend came over to kiss me after. he didn’t say a word. just kissed me slow like he loved me even more.
we’ve done it twice since.