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I never thought I’d actually do it. My boyfriend (let’s call him J) had been bringing it up for months this fantasy of watching me with another guy. At first I thought it was just one of those things guys say when they’re horny, you know? Like dirty talk that stays in the bedroom.
But he kept bringing it up. And honestly? The more we talked about it, the more curious I got. We’re both in uni, been together since JC, and he’s the only guy I’ve ever slept with. Sometimes I wondered what it would be like with someone else. Just… wondered. His best friend K was the obvious choice. They’ve known each other since secondary school, and K is objectively hot. Like unfairly hot. Rugby player build, tall, this confidence that J just doesn’t have. It felt safe because K was someone we both trusted.
We planned it for weeks. J wanted to “catch us” instead of just watching, which felt less awkward to me. So I invited K over when J was supposedly at the library. The plan was that J would come back “unexpectedly” and… we’d see what happened. When K arrived, I was so nervous I was shaking. We sat on my living room couch (HDB flat, parents were overseas) and I kept laughing at nothing because I didn’t know what to do. K was cool about it. He knew the plan. He put his hand on my thigh and asked if I was sure. I wasn’t sure. But I nodded anyway. The kissing started slow. Tentative. And then J’s key turned in the lock. I expected him to be shocked. Jealous. Something. But when he walked in and saw K’s hand up my shirt, his face just… changed. He went still. And then he sat down in the armchair across from us and said “Don’t stop.”
So I didn’t.
K was different from J. Rougher, more confident. When he lifted my legs and pulled my panties off right there on the couch, he didn’t ask if I was okay every five seconds like J does. He just knew. And having J watch from across the room, his eyes locked on mine while K entered me… I can’t explain it. The power of it. The intensity. Afterward, J and I didn’t talk for two days. I thought I’d ruined everything. But then he texted me: “Can we do that again?”
Now it’s become this thing we do. Not often. But enough that I can’t imagine our relationship without it.
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